Member-only story

Why Do People Still Rob Banks?

Bev Potter
3 min readJul 8, 2022

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(Photo: Warner Bros.)

All I wanted to do was go to Aldi’s. It seemed so simple. Drive to Aldi’s, find the donuts my mom likes, and leave. Okay, find another 20 things or so, and then leave.

But noooooooo.

As I crested the hill just below the bank, where I normally cut through to get to Aldi’s, I saw a Sheriff’s cruiser blocking the entrance. I looked over at the bank’s parking lot and the place was crawling with cops.

“Sonofabitch,” I said to Hershey, “somebody robbed the bank.”

I don’t know what it is about Northeastern Ohio or my county in particular, but we are lousy with bank robbers. Somebody’s always robbing a freakin’ bank around here and I don’t understand why.

I mean, you know they have cameras everywhere, right? It’s as bad as Vegas. They’re going to have 15 stills of you before you make it out the door.

Like this:

Hello, 911? Tiger Woods just robbed the Huntington. (Photo: WOIO Cleveland)

Okay, it’s not the greatest photo. But seriously, it’s like he thought, “Maybe if I dress like somebody’s dad. ”

And this isn’t 1920’s Oklahoma. Where the hell do you think you’re going to go? Apparently…

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Bev Potter
Bev Potter

Written by Bev Potter

Legal secretary by day, insomniac by night. Ally. BA, MA. Humor, pop culture, and things that make you think. My weekly-ish newsletter is bevpotter.substack.com

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