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Why Do People Still Rob Banks?
All I wanted to do was go to Aldi’s. It seemed so simple. Drive to Aldi’s, find the donuts my mom likes, and leave. Okay, find another 20 things or so, and then leave.
But noooooooo.
As I crested the hill just below the bank, where I normally cut through to get to Aldi’s, I saw a Sheriff’s cruiser blocking the entrance. I looked over at the bank’s parking lot and the place was crawling with cops.
“Sonofabitch,” I said to Hershey, “somebody robbed the bank.”
I don’t know what it is about Northeastern Ohio or my county in particular, but we are lousy with bank robbers. Somebody’s always robbing a freakin’ bank around here and I don’t understand why.
I mean, you know they have cameras everywhere, right? It’s as bad as Vegas. They’re going to have 15 stills of you before you make it out the door.
Like this:
Okay, it’s not the greatest photo. But seriously, it’s like he thought, “Maybe if I dress like somebody’s dad. ”
And this isn’t 1920’s Oklahoma. Where the hell do you think you’re going to go? Apparently…