Satire

Whacky Goop Merchandise, or Old-Timey Medical Cure?

Photo by Vanessa von Wieding on Unsplash

Which of these did Gwyneth Paltrow dream up while she was hammered on rosé, and which ones are old-timey medical cures? You’ll have to figure it out for yourself.

  1. Ear Candling. Melting candle wax into your ear in order to remove the wax that’s already there. That which does not make me…