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CHRISTMAS HUMOR
The Truth Behind Popular Christmas Songs
I’m sorry in advance if I ruin these songs for you forever
I’ll Be Home for Christmas
Family member promises that, seriously, this year he’ll make it home for Christmas. Absolutely, positively, “You can plan on me!”
Sure, he’s said this a million times before, but this time, he means it!
So you do all this work, you go to Home Depot at the absolutely worst time of the year, it’s worse than a Taylor Swift concert. You get the snow, the mistletoe, you put presents on the tree because that’s what he asked for — which was really hard from an engineering standpoint, by the way, and took, like, three days between the limbs falling off and then duct-taping them back on, and it was just a whole production — and then at the last minute he sends a text that says “If only in my dreams. Psych!” and doesn’t show up. WTF.
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
Small child finds out the hard way that mommy and daddy are in an “open” relationship, setting the child up for a string of “uncles” and a lifetime of therapy.
