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The Care And Feeding Of Your Amateur Golfer
It’s not for everyone.
Congratulations on your decision to date/life partner with/marry an amateur golfer! You don’t know it yet, but you deserve a medal!
The first thing you should know is that all amateur golfers are male. None of the following applies to female amateur golfers because, as women, they were born with common sense.
While sightings of female amateur golfers do occasionally occur, you’ll encounter much less cussing/club throwing/cheating should you choose to approach.
It’s amazingly easy to feed your amateur golfer since they can subsist for days on only two lukewarm hotdogs, a bag of chips, and a red cup full of flat beer. You should charge your amateur golfer $50 for this meal to make him feel more comfortable in his surroundings.
It also helps if you can find a bubbly young woman to serve it to him out of the back of a golf cart. Split the tips!
I know someone who’s paying her way through Vanderbilt by being a cart girl and she doesn’t even have to get naked!
Your amateur golfer will say things to you that at first seem incomprehensible, such as, “It was slow coming around the…