NOSTALGIA

The ’80s Were Bitchin’

When slang was an art form.

Source: Atlantic Releasing Corp.

This has nothing to do with anything, but it’s always fun to go a little Jack Kerouac.

I’ve been eating a lot of McDonald’s lately because I have coupons (*choir of angels sings*) and I cannot, MUST not let their lives have been in vain.

This is why poor people die sooner. If you only have $5, are you going to buy a clamshell of organic lettuce, or are you going to buy a Big Mac meal?

I rest my case.

The coupons are only good at one McDonald’s near me and I usually go on a weekend morning. The same woman works this drive-thru window every weekend.

And this is what she says to me every weekend:

“I like your glasses.”

Every. Single. Weekend.

Now, I’m pretty sure she’s giving me a compliment in all sincerity because, come on, they are pretty great glasses.

But every weekend? It’s like Groundhog Day.

I get that she must talk to about a billion people, but you’d think after the third or fourth time, she’d at least recognize the glasses.

I know I’m getting old because I don’t know any of the current slang terms the kids are using. I’ve managed to…