Humor

No, I Will Not Be “Springing Forward” This Year

Photo by Lukas Blazek on Unsplash

Like all red-blooded patriotic Americans, I have decided to do whatever the hell I want to do whether it makes any sense or not.

And this year, I’ve decided not to change over to Daylight Savings Time.

(Yes, I know it’s actually ‘Daylight Saving Time’, but that’s just another piece of the Socialist plot to overthrow America. I’m absolutely positive that real patriotic Americans like The Pillow Guy say ‘Daylight Savings Time’ and ‘supposably’.)

Do you know why Daylight Savings Time was invented? To save energy and to give farmers more time to work in the fields during the summer.

Growing food so everybody has enough to eat? It doesn’t get much more Commie than that.

To play on people’s emotions and to draw attention to what in my opinion is the right thing to do, I’ve coined the phrase “Freedom Time” (FT) which is the opposite of Daylight Savings Time (DST) or “Bernie Sanders Time” (BST).

If you’d like to join a Facebook Chat for supporters of Freedom Time, jump on the Zoom at 8:00 p.m., which is really 7:00 p.m. FT, or 4:00 p.m. Pacific which is really 3:00 p.m. FT.