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HUMOR
I Have Decided to Live on a Cruise Ship Until I Die
My kids say I’m nuts, but I’ll be laughing all the way to the lifeboats
“Retiree leaves Orange County home in her wake to live on cruise ship at sea” — nbclosangeles.com
“Cheryl,” I said to my neighbor, Cheryl, “I can either die here in this upscale 55+ retirement community which boasts seven clubhouses, 36 holes of golf, five swimming pools, an equestrian center, and over 250 clubs and organizations, or I can die on a floating sardine can where I wake up every morning to the thrill of knowing that today might be the day we’re boarded by Somalian pirates.”
She couldn’t argue with that logic.
My kids are threatening to petition the Court to appoint a guardian of my person and estate, but you know what I’ll say to the judge?
I’ll say, “Your Honor, I’m either going to have to evacuate my home on land because of wildfires, or I’m going to have to evacuate my home at sea because a kraken has risen from the depths and wrapped a Princess Cruise Lines ship in its monstrous tentacles. Which would you choose?”
I was already on a flight to Vancouver to ship out before the judge could make a ruling.
