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I Don’t Care How You Raise Your Kids
But boy, am I critical of how you’re raising your dog
My boss bought a Porsche, so in retaliation, his wife bought a dog.
Because these two things are equivalent. At least, in her mind they are.
I used to think that being wealthy and highly educated meant you made good decisions. But the world has shown me, time and again, just how wildly wrong I was.
In fact, I’m beginning to think that the richer you are, the dumber you are.
Cunning? Yes.
Crafty, immoral, and possibly evil? Yes.
Smart? Not so much.
So my boss is now co-owner of a 10-week-old Golden Retriever named Oliver.
(I’ll just let that sink in for a minute.)
The dog should be wearing round glasses and a little school uniform.
Dogs can only really handle two syllables per word, so “Oliver” is pushing it. My boss of course complains that Oliver doesn’t come to his name, although I just spent 5 hours puppysitting him and he came to me every single time I called him.
Hm.