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Humor
I Did One Plank And Now I’m In Perfect Physical Condition
It was super hard, but so worth it. #planklife
After many years of training and determination, I’m pleased to announce that I have finally performed one plank which lasted (almost) a minute (give or take 30 seconds).
I am now a perfect human specimen in peak physical condition.
As everybody knows, planking is the most difficult exercise in the world. For some bizarre reason, there’s nothing harder than holding your body up on your forearms and toes a few inches from the floor.
It has something to do with your “core”, which is what we used to call our “stomach” or “middle”, but that was wrong, because it’s actually called your “core.” Never, ever call it your “tummy” or “midsection”. There is only your “core”.
If you ever refer to your “abdomen” as anything other than your “core”, your gym membership will immediately be revoked and you’ll be beaten with a sock full of oranges by a personal trainer.
Before planking was invented two years ago by fitness models on Instagram, people only knew how to do something called “push-ups”, which is basically planking up and down.
