HUMOR

Bed Bugs Are Showing Up In More Places Than Just Your Bed

They’re driving that car in front of you in the McDonald’s drive-thru.

CHOMPY, CHOMPY! (Photo by DANNY G on Unsplash)

Paris is battling an infestation of bloodsucking bedbugs on trains and in movie theaters… The pests have been spotted on public transport and in movie theaters in the French capital. — Lara O. Reilly, Insider.com

Ten years ago, nobody talked about bed bugs. Now if you stop at a Super 8 for more than five minutes, you’re bringing home a herd of bed bugs that will force you to burn down your house and move to another state.

Despite their name, bed bugs are showing up in more places than just your bed.

You know how in the drive-thru lane you always end up behind a car driven by somebody who acts like they’ve never seen a McDonald’s menu before and takes five minutes to order a four-piece Chicken McNugget?

And you sit there making dramatic gestures with your hands hoping they see you in their sideview mirror, but they don’t because they’re studying the menu like it’s the Dead Sea Scrolls and you keep saying “IT’S McDONALD’S FOR CHRIST’S SAKE!” really loud in your car with the window open but they don’t hear you because they’re yelling “DO YOU HAVE…