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OPEN LETTER
An Open Letter To The Idiot Jogging On A Hilly Country Road At Sunset
Dear Moron:
I know when you set out on your run, you thought, “It’s almost dark. I should wear a gray T-Shirt, dark blue shorts and blue shoes since I’m going to be running on a country road with lots of hills.”
Clearly, you have a death wish.
At least you were running against the flow of traffic which is more than most people can manage. When I was a kid, it was beaten into us on a regular basis that you ride a bicycle with traffic and you walk against traffic.
But just like everything else that makes even the tiniest bit of sense, that knowledge has fallen by the wayside.
It takes all of my willpower, all of my willpower, not to roll down my window as I pass people and yell, “You ride a bicycle with traffic and you walk against traffic. DO THEY NOT TEACH YOU PEOPLE ANYTHING THESE DAYS?”
Speaking of falling by the wayside, that’s what you almost did when I came within two inches of clipping you with my sideview mirror when I crested a hill at 50 mph to find you lumbering up the other side.
You dumb, Buster Bluth-lookin’ mofo.
